It was recently posited to me that asking someone out quite closely parallels trying to get a job interview. His basic premise: after initial interview you often are needed back for a secondary one after candidates for the position have been narrowed down, if you get the job you need to perform well or you'll get fired, and if you don't like quitting outright you can deliberately sabotage the job and hope that they don't need your services so badly that they keep you anyway.
Not a bad comparison overall. I constantly hear people say relationships are work. Maybe I misinterpreted that as a metaphor. Perhaps analysis of the opposite will yield better understanding. Being unemployed vs being 'unemployed':
* Don't care about what you look like
* The main things you spend money on are alcohol and fast food
* You spend half the day celebrating not having to work and the other half scheming of ways to get someone to pay you without putting in the effort
* You hate being around people who are 'employed'
* The most frequented place outside of your apt is your parents house
* While everyone else is 'working' you spend your time playing video games and watching TV
* The older you get, the more socially unacceptable it seems to become
The only problem lies in the fact that if you go long enough without having a real job the government will send you a welfare check. Maybe I need to stick with it longer but I have yet to receive a giant box with holes punched in it that smells like cheap perfume with the return address of the US government.
Monday, November 15, 2010
Friday, November 12, 2010
Omaha being Omaha
Wow, It's been awhile since I dusted off the digital pen and started blogging again. Hard to get back on the horse after a layoff. Now I know what aging pornstars must feel like.
Anyway, I recently left my second job at a gym. My job description was essentially to walk around to....anyone, and give them a free week pass to come into the gym. Seemingly not that difficult. However, I'm here to tell you that not all humans share my zeal for anything free. Most people were willing to give me their names. I did have a few entries that made me question their validity: China, Zappo, Fabi, and Koko (a guy) but not like I can call them out while trying to get them to accept a coupon from me. One trend I did pick up was that I had a alarmingly high 'hit' rate (meaning cell phone and name) from the 30-45 year old women demographic. Now, I'm not a salesmen, but this type of statistic would suggest that maybe I should be, for a product like Botox, e-harmony, or cougar perfume. This, coupled with my popularity with the 19 and under crowd at my previous gym pretty much tells me the only group of people I have no idea how to talk to is the one I currently exist in. I'm sure there is a marketing opportunity in here somewhere but I can't quite put my finger on it.
One other reason I probably shouldn't try to make a living selling is the simple fact that I have off days. You know, days where talking to someone you don't know ranks slightly below swallowing a urine coated pine cone. Now I'm not saying my days are the worst, BUT the combination of bloodshot sleepy eyes, a size medium black shirt (you'd think at a gym where they promote working out there'd be more XL's), a five day old beard, and aggressively walking up to people with my finger pointed loudly saying, "Hey, You want a free pass to a gym!" has yielded very low results so far.
Anyway, I recently left my second job at a gym. My job description was essentially to walk around to....anyone, and give them a free week pass to come into the gym. Seemingly not that difficult. However, I'm here to tell you that not all humans share my zeal for anything free. Most people were willing to give me their names. I did have a few entries that made me question their validity: China, Zappo, Fabi, and Koko (a guy) but not like I can call them out while trying to get them to accept a coupon from me. One trend I did pick up was that I had a alarmingly high 'hit' rate (meaning cell phone and name) from the 30-45 year old women demographic. Now, I'm not a salesmen, but this type of statistic would suggest that maybe I should be, for a product like Botox, e-harmony, or cougar perfume. This, coupled with my popularity with the 19 and under crowd at my previous gym pretty much tells me the only group of people I have no idea how to talk to is the one I currently exist in. I'm sure there is a marketing opportunity in here somewhere but I can't quite put my finger on it.
One other reason I probably shouldn't try to make a living selling is the simple fact that I have off days. You know, days where talking to someone you don't know ranks slightly below swallowing a urine coated pine cone. Now I'm not saying my days are the worst, BUT the combination of bloodshot sleepy eyes, a size medium black shirt (you'd think at a gym where they promote working out there'd be more XL's), a five day old beard, and aggressively walking up to people with my finger pointed loudly saying, "Hey, You want a free pass to a gym!" has yielded very low results so far.
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